I wasn't planning on staying here overnight, I wanted to avoid the dreaded morning after, but I must have fallen asleep at some point because I woke up to the smell of bacon and peppers so strong it was as if they were passing through the hand-carved slots of Mrs. Laughlin's ornate rosewood headboard. I checked the clock: 9:30 A.D. Other than my annual two-week vacation, I hadn't slept this late on a weekday since college. I guess being unemployed, or in Mrs. Laughlin's case unemployed and divorced, had its upsides. The whiskey from the night before throbbed in my temples, pressing on my eardrums like the pressure of altitude. I put on my jeans and t-shirt and ran to the bathroom. It had his and hers porcelain sinks. His was free, I thought, so I turned on the water and stuck my head in, got my hair and face wet, turned my mouth and drank it straight from the tap like I did from the garden hose at home during all those muggy Midwest conditions. heat waves. Closing the knob, I smoothed the cowlick down to a manageable level, then dried my face with a soft white MKL embroidered towel. In the kitchen, Mrs. Laughlin took a pan from the stove and poured its contents onto two plates. In the kitchen, Mrs. Laughlin took the pan from the stove and poured its contents onto two plates. He pushed one towards me across the granite counter. I stared at slices of bacon cut thick and crispy at the edges, a pile of French fries sprinkled with bits of red and green peppers. I put a slice of bacon in my mouth and chewed it in about two seconds. “Well, good morning to you too, Mr. Paul,” laughed Mrs. Laughlin. “I figured if your hangover was even half as bad as mine, you'd appreciate some fried meat. Coffee?" She held up... half a sheet of paper... throw the shit away but don't do it off that damn roof again." "I told you, it wasn't the roof. It was my window." "It doesn't matter, man. The point is, you might hurt someone." «Okay, Fernando.» “I'm serious, man. It's all about going crazy and destroying your personal property and stuff, but that doesn't mean you have to put other people's well-being on the line. “Okay,” I repeated. “Next time it might be someone's head that catches that shit, rather than a big pile of rubbish.” "Okay, okay, okay." Are you sure you don't want to watch a movie?" "Fernando, I'm exhausted." "Yes, unemployment can be exhausting. Am I right, Pauli D?” «You're right, Fern. You are right. Don't call me Paulie D." “Then don't call me Fern, you son of a bitch. Only Ern can call me Fern." "Okay, hi Fernando." "Don't worry, my friend.".”* * * *